Note to Self...

Saturday I attended the Arizona Association of Gifted & Talented (AAGT) conference here in Tucson.  They had three keynote speakers and a panel of four experts (including the 3 speakers and one additional expert) who spoke about the social and emotional needs of gifted children.


Unfortunately, since moving to AZ I haven't found a G&T community to connect with and, sadly, had forgotten just how wonderful it was to be around others with children like Janan.


Just to be in a room with experts, parents, and educators who understand the daily joys and challenges of parenting these children relived stress I didn't even realize I'd been carrying around.


The first speaker, Dr. Ed Amend of Amend Psychological Services (based in KY) is a psychologist who specializes in working with gifted children.  Oh, what I wouldn't GIVE for him to be local!  He had a warm, easy-going personality and a sense of humor that not only helped us all laugh about the quirks of our children, but reaffirmed we aren't wrong when we identify our children as "special needs".  His informative presentation was scattered with cartoons that, literally, brought the house down with laughter.

This first one related to his conversation about how "gifted kids are bright, but something's just not right."  And, why this makes it so difficult to discuss our children's abilities publicly.  I've blogged about this aspect with Janan MORE than once!  It's the "she-can- understand-String-Theory,-but-fork-usage-evades-her- understanding" thing.  


He reminded us that this is what's called "Asynchronous development" and it's VERY common in gifted children.  But, laughing at or teasing our children for these discrepancies (which, sadly, very often happens in the school systems) can be very damaging. 


He spoke eloquently on how high IQ is indicative of high achievement capability, but does NOT mean our children will get straight A's in school.  This is because our children often believe, "If it's worth doing, it's worth doing well." But, THEY decide what's worthy and what's not.  "Busy work", worksheets, repeated topics, etc. not only lead to boredom, but will very often lead our kids to just "opt out".  And, because our schools are still teaching to a test, they have a very linear, structured way of teaching.  Gifted kids don't work that way.

I've been dealing with this very issue with Janan lately.  BASIS is a school that is TOTALLY academically focused.  They teach a very rigorous, AP level curriculum and broach no deviation from the way they believe things should be done.  So, while Janan is practically acing every exam in classes like Latin, AP History, Algebra, and Physics, her grades are lower because she opts to not turn in assignments.  


The other thing I loved about his presentation was something I've said SO many times since Janan was identified as gifted - that "giftedness can be used to EXPLAIN behavior, but should never be used to EXCUSE it."  So, this is why I have to sit down with Janan on an almost daily basis and have the conversation of, "If you want to stay at BASIS then you have to agree to do things their way."  It can be challenging (especially when even I'M questioning the need for 40 review math problems EVERY night - and, no, that's not an exaggeration), but the school's not going to change for her.


I also LOVED his statement about how gifted athletes are identified early and, very often, given the chance to expand and develop their skills working with more advanced athletic programs.  Think of how many times in the news you hear or read about gifted football, basketball, or soccer players who are taken from junior high to high school teams or high school to college level teams well before they're in those grades, simply because of their identified/recognized talents (seriously, our society PAYS people to find these kids!).


Our society does NOT do this with the academically gifted.  Instead, there's this philosophy that they'll just be the "cream that will rise to the top".  While, at the same time our society ostracizes these children and often causes them to "dumb themselves down" just to fit in.  

He put up a spectrum that showed "Dis-Identifiers" (children who don't WANT to be gifted and strive to just be "normal") on the far left to "Invisibles" (children who know they're gifted, but don't want anyone else to know) in the center and "High Visibility" (children who know they're gifted and don't care who else knows).  Janan falls between Invisible and Dis-Identifier and gets closer and closer to full Dis-Identifier as she goes through the pre-teen years and just wants to fit in.


IMAGINE what our world would be like if we identified and elevated the academically gifted in the same way we do the athletically gifted!  If children like Janan could be PROUD, honored and encouraged for their academic abilities - what a different world this would be!  


The next speakers were Dr. James Webb & Arlene DeVries, M.S.E.  Their presentation on Living in the Gifted Family also had insights, laughter and reaffirmations for all of us.


Something new I learned was about Dobrowski's Theory of Overexcitability.  Dr. Webb explained that the brighter the child, the greater the level of excitability and the chance that they fall into more than one category. 


OE's as they're called fall into 5 categories:

• Intellectual - high curiosity, interested in many things, good concentration, problem solving ability
  
• Imaginational - very dramatic, can visualize well, great imaginations, have imaginary friends when young
  
• Emotional - very moody and can change from moment to moment, cry easily, have high anxiety, react strongly to any changes in environment
  
• Psychomotor - rapid speech pattern, have a surplus of energy and nervous habits, impulsive actions, can't sit still
  
• Sensual - enjoy sensory pleasures, textures, tastes, can't stand tags in clothing or "ugly" colors. Avoid overstimulation.

As he went through each one, I was able to check them off:

• Intellectual - Well, if you've spent even 5 minutes with Janan you KNOW she's intellectually driven.  She wants to know EVERYTHING and how everything works.  Very little gets past her.

• Imaginational - Dr. Webb described these children as the Drama Queens and Kings.  Janan had an imaginary friend as a child named Honey and could spend HOURS playing with her Schleich fairies creating elaborate stories and worlds no one else could understand. This also explains why she reads and re-reads certain books, because she can actually BECOME the characters in the books.  (Oh, that explains SO much!)

• Emotional - Take a gifted, emotionally overexcitable child and add pre-teen hormones and it explains a LOT.

• Psychomotor - Gifted kids are in CONSTANT motion.  Janan's no exception. Her body is perpetually moving and when she really gets excited about something she can literally shake all over.  Her legs shake when she's sitting and she talks in her sleep.

• Sensual - This goes to the Sensory Integration stuff I posted about before. The whole can't wear socks, tight clothing, brush her hair stuff.  And, why she still prefers to eat her food with her fingers.  She HAS to feel it first!  

Then, they put up this chart:

This chart is from research done by Deborah Ruf, a specialist in the field of giftedness.  Janan falls in Level Five.  

*SIGH*

So, note to self, take that level of giftedness, remember it correlates with the overexcitability and BAM! now I know why there are days I can't even remember my own name.  I'm intellectually sparring with a child who can take me down without breaking a sweat.  

When I was looking for the cartoons Dr. Amend had used, I found this one and it sums everything up for me in one picture:

The little girl hanging on the window sill even LOOKS like Janan.

THIS is why both Janan & I need a G&T community. Why she not only NEEDS, but deserves a school that encourages, honors and acknowledges who she is. I truly hope we've found it the community....the school is going to be a lot harder.